Money sucks, who wants it? When you have loads of cash, and you’re forced to gargle with Bird’s Nest or Single Malt Scotch, there’s nothing to do but get rid of it. And what better way to do that than by spending it the most outrageously expensive rental options? Bask in the luxury of these units, which are also conveniently located where poor people can’t assassinate you in a fit of rage:
18 Anderson Road (District 10)
4 Bedrooms, 4 Bathrooms, 6,125 square feet
$36,700 per month ($5.99 per square foot)
We’re not sure what the “18” in Nouvel 18 stands for. Maybe it’s the address, or maybe it’s the number of people in the country who can afford to live there.
Nouvel 18 is an award winning development, and the interior architecture is one of the most amazing you’ll find anywhere. The unit is designed to allow for maximum natural light, and it blurs the distinction between indoor and outdoor space; the kitchen feels like it’s in the open, even though it’s fully enclosed. The effect is especially beautiful when it rains, and the large glass windows look like waterfalls.
Nouvel 18 is most famous for its eight separate sky terraces, so you can maintain that whole “my feet never have to touch the earth” vibe. There’s even an in-house concierge service, so home maintenance is never a problem; you’ll be one of the privileged few who can get the air-con repairman to arrive before your third sweat stain. Also of interest is the aqua gym, which is quite unique among Singapore’s condos.
In terms of location, you can walk to Orchard Road in ten minutes. By car, you’d be a mere 10 minutes drive from the Central Business District. This is about as central as you can get, and the price reflects that.
11C Balmoral Road (District 10)
4 Bedrooms, 4 Bathrooms, 6,125 square feet
$32,000 per month ($5.22 per square foot)
It’s important to save money and live within your means. So instead of spending $36,700 per month on rent, try spending just $32,000. Also, try eating foods that have only been lightly sprinkled with gold dust, as opposed to actually being coated in it. Frugality is tough, we know.
At 6,125 square feet, this unit is big enough to comfortably house you, your family, and half of Kanye West’s ego. The Oliv is a mere 10 minutes drive from Orchard Road, and the nearby Balmoral Plaza should be sufficient for basic retail needs.
The Oliv is also close to the Newton MRT station, and hence the Newton Food Centre. At your budget range, the prawn noodles there should be barely affordable (for the rest of us, it’s a good thing we have easy access to a second mortgage if we want to eat there).
Marina Bay Residences
18 Marina Boulevard (District 1)
5 Bedrooms, 5 Bathrooms, 3,972 square feet
$30,000 per month ($7.55 per square foot)
This is a gorgeous two-storey unit, located in Singapore’s ritziest area. This is where nightclub bouncers compare the Rolexes they bought with last week’s tips. As you can expect, all the usual condo amenities like pools and gyms apply; but it’s the location that makes this unit stand out.
The main highlight of living here is, of course, quick access to the Marina Bay area. It’s got upscale eateries, entertainment events, and one really terrible food court (we think it’s just a plot to encourage you to eat at the restaurants). This area is also close to the Central Business District – about eight minutes by car – but isn’t as congested as the nearby Robinson Road.
Note that several novelty events, like the light festival and the recent ArtBox event, tend to take place in the Marina Bay area. This keeps the surroundings interesting.
7 Ardmore Park (District 10)
4 Bedrooms, 4 Bathrooms, 3,186 square feet
$25,000 per month ($7.85 per square foot)
Ardmore Residence is one of the top 10 skyscrapers in the world, according to the Emporis Skyscraper Award (no doubt a vital fact to our readers who pay close attention to this award, all two of you). More importantly, Ardmore Residence has been one of the “highlight properties” along Orchard Road since its completion in 2013.
With its 24 hour home maintenance service (never fix a lightbulb on your own again), and proximity to the Orchard shopping belt, this development is the baseline against which all other luxury condos are measured.
While there are cheaper rental units in the same development (because we’re really talking about a budget-conscious demographic here) this particular listing is one of the larger ones. If you have children or multiple pets, this one will suit your lifestyle better.
82 Grange Road (District 10)
5 Bedrooms, 5 Bathrooms, 7,000 square feet
$27,000 per month ($3.86 per square foot)
The Colonnade is one of the older units in District 10, but it’s still a landmark development. The units all have double ceilings, one of the first developments in which this was done (it was completed in 1986). The Colonnade is particularly famous for its gigantic balconies; these are big enough to pull up a chair and a coffee, and gaze over the horizon. These days, developers only build ledges that big for air-conditioners.
At 7,000 square feet (two levels), this is the most massive, non-landed rental unit we’ve ever seen. It’s huge – we mean really, really, huge. If two families of orang utans engaged in a fight to the death in the living room, you wouldn’t notice for 20 minutes until you look up from the sofa at the other end. If you carpet it, you’ll probably burn out three vacuum cleaners a month.
On a per square foot basis, this unit is…actually reasonable for the price – it’s actually comparable to many mass market condos, in less accessible locations.
Being on Grange Road, residents here are within five to eight minutes drive of Ion Orchard or Tanglin Mall. It’s also nicely located far enough that traffic congestion and noise isn’t a problem.