{"id":19377,"date":"2018-08-22T06:02:10","date_gmt":"2018-08-21T22:02:10","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/www.99.co\/blog\/singapore\/?p=19377"},"modified":"2022-07-01T04:59:32","modified_gmt":"2022-06-30T20:59:32","slug":"buying-home-mistakes-marriage","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.99.co\/singapore\/insider\/buying-home-mistakes-marriage\/","title":{"rendered":"Buying your first home: 5 mistakes that put your marriage at risk"},"content":{"rendered":"<div id=\"bsf_rt_marker\"><\/div><p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">So you\u2019ve just gotten into a big lifetime commitment of getting married, and want to celebrate that by getting into\u2026a big lifetime commitment of buying a home. Being Singaporean, most of us have a strict need to secure a house the moment we\u2019re married. That tends to result in some rash decisions, with consequences of the \u201cscreaming and sleeping on the couch\u201d variety or, worse, putting your entire marriage at risk. Here\u2019s where you should tread carefully:<\/span><\/p>\n<ol>\n<li>\n<h3><b> Not working out who will pay for what<\/b><\/h3>\n<\/li>\n<\/ol>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">To save yourself major arguments later on, it helps to have a frank discussion on who pays for what. This doesn\u2019t always have to be a 50-50 split, and it\u2019s actually quite rare and impractical to do that.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Both sides should work out how much their monthly income can handle. For example, say you earn $12,000 a month and your spouse earns $3,200 a month. <\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Your combined household income means you can\u2019t get flat, so a condo it is. But if the condo\u2019s monthly repayments come to $3,700 a month, is it really a good idea to split 50-50? At $1,850 a month, your spouse is going to have $450 left every month.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">You may be sure you won\u2019t fight about this <\/span><i><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">now<\/span><\/i><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">, but this sort of imbalance could continue for the next 25 years of your shared mortgage. Feelings of extreme dependency \u2013 or personal financial vulnerability \u2013 can eat away at people.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">You should also work out how much of the down payment each side will cover, how the cost maintenance and taxes will be split, and how much equity each side will have. <\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">In the off-chance of legal separation later (may it neve happen), documenting this arrangement will be a big help.<\/span><\/p>\n<ol start=\"2\">\n<li>\n<h3><b> You think of the house as an investment; your spouse thinks of it as a home<\/b><\/h3>\n<\/li>\n<\/ol>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Is your house part of your long-term investment plans? If you intend to sell the house in five to 10 years to upgrade, make sure your spouse is on the same page.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Some of the nastiest fights happen when one party wants to sell, and the other refuses. This is especially true if the house has significant emotional value to one side (e.g. you were raised in the same house by your parents, whereas your spouse has always seen it as a stepping stone toward a condo). <\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">If both of you agree that the house is an investment, then have a shared exit strategy. Decide when you\u2019ll sell the house (at a certain date? When the value hits a given amount?) and what the subsequent plan will be.<\/span><\/p>\n<figure id=\"attachment_19379\" aria-describedby=\"caption-attachment-19379\" style=\"width: 720px\" class=\"wp-caption aligncenter\"><img decoding=\"async\" class=\"size-full wp-image-19379\" src=\"https:\/\/www.99.co\/singapore\/insider\/wp-content\/uploads\/2018\/08\/buying-first-home-mistakes-couple.jpg\" alt=\"buying first home mistakes couple\" width=\"720\" height=\"480\" srcset=\"https:\/\/www.99.co\/singapore\/insider\/wp-content\/uploads\/2018\/08\/buying-first-home-mistakes-couple.jpg 720w, https:\/\/www.99.co\/singapore\/insider\/wp-content\/uploads\/2018\/08\/buying-first-home-mistakes-couple-600x400.jpg 600w, https:\/\/www.99.co\/singapore\/insider\/wp-content\/uploads\/2018\/08\/buying-first-home-mistakes-couple-440x294.jpg 440w\" sizes=\"(max-width: 720px) 100vw, 720px\" \/><figcaption id=\"caption-attachment-19379\" class=\"wp-caption-text\">&#8220;Can you stop talking about asset appreciation?&#8221;<\/figcaption><\/figure>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n<ol start=\"3\">\n<li>\n<h3><b> Allowing too much involvement of the in-laws<\/b><\/h3>\n<\/li>\n<\/ol>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">It\u2019s your house; avoid allowing in-laws to give too much input. This is especially true when it comes to financial contributions: as far as possible, try to keep payments between you and your spouse.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Even if it means living in a five-room instead of an Executive Condo, it\u2019s best that you don\u2019t rely on that unofficial $100,000 loan from your in-laws. <\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">This can come back to plague you later: at best, you\u2019ll constantly be reminded of how much you owe your spouse\u2019s parents. At worst, a financial disaster might make you unable to repay the loan, and sour your entire relationship. <\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Another problem with giving your in-laws too much input is that you may not end up with the house you want. For example, you might end up living in Jurong when you prefer the east, because the in-laws want to be close to any grandchildren. <\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Remember the impact of time: it\u2019s a concession you may be ready to make now, but it can become intolerable over a period of five, 10, or 25 years. <\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Draw a line at how inclusive you\u2019re being, with regard to both your parents and your in-laws. <\/span><\/p>\n<ol start=\"4\">\n<li>\n<h3><b> Pushing your shared finances to the very limit<\/b><\/h3>\n<\/li>\n<\/ol>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">You\u2019ll be surprised at how much you can afford, if both you and your spouse choose to keep working. In cases where both parties are professionals, they\u2019re often surprised by the quality of homes they can afford. <\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">For example, if a couple earns $7,000 each, they can plausibly get a mortgage that costs around $8,000 a month. This is enough for a very nice <\/span><a href=\"https:\/\/www.99.co\/singapore\/sale\/property\/120-grange-condo-FWbgZCG9QUPpkU2aPJbCkR\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Grange Road condo<\/span><\/a><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">, or something on <\/span><a href=\"https:\/\/www.99.co\/singapore\/sale?listing_type=sale&amp;map_bounds=1.278626%2C103.782461%2C1.353451%2C103.87018&amp;name=D10%20-%20Tanglin%20%2F%20Holland&amp;page_num=1&amp;page_size=30&amp;price_max=2000000&amp;property_segments=residential&amp;query_coords=1.312863760516108%2C103.80782108200053&amp;query_ids=dtdistrict10&amp;query_limit=radius&amp;query_type=district&amp;radius_max=1000&amp;rental_type=unit&amp;show_future_mrts=true&amp;zoom=13\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Cuscaden Walk<\/span><\/a><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">. <\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">This realisation often causes young, married professionals to go overboard. <\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">But don\u2019t throw financial prudence out the window. Remember that your total loan repayments \u2013 from all your debts &#8211; shouldn\u2019t exceed 40 per cent of your total monthly income. <\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Also, pushing your finances to the limit can cause resentment if one of you suddenly loses your job, or faces a drop in income. <\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">In the above example, imagine if one spouse becomes unable to pay the mortgage: there\u2019s no way one side can keep paying over $8,000 a month, when their monthly salary is $7,000.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">And tempers <\/span><i><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">will <\/span><\/i><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">start to fray, if one spouse gets blamed for losing the house.<\/span><\/p>\n<figure id=\"attachment_18115\" aria-describedby=\"caption-attachment-18115\" style=\"width: 720px\" class=\"wp-caption aligncenter\"><img decoding=\"async\" class=\"wp-image-18115 size-full\" src=\"https:\/\/www.99.co\/singapore\/insider\/wp-content\/uploads\/2018\/07\/executive-condominium-alternatives.jpg\" alt=\"Executive Condominium Alternatives\" width=\"720\" height=\"480\" srcset=\"https:\/\/www.99.co\/singapore\/insider\/wp-content\/uploads\/2018\/07\/executive-condominium-alternatives.jpg 720w, https:\/\/www.99.co\/singapore\/insider\/wp-content\/uploads\/2018\/07\/executive-condominium-alternatives-600x400.jpg 600w, https:\/\/www.99.co\/singapore\/insider\/wp-content\/uploads\/2018\/07\/executive-condominium-alternatives-440x294.jpg 440w\" sizes=\"(max-width: 720px) 100vw, 720px\" \/><figcaption id=\"caption-attachment-18115\" class=\"wp-caption-text\">Buying a condo: Think before you leap<\/figcaption><\/figure>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n<ol start=\"5\">\n<li>\n<h3><b> Forgetting to consider your spouse\u2019s credit history<\/b><\/h3>\n<\/li>\n<\/ol>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">If your spouse has a bad credit history, or a record of bankruptcy, you\u2019re going to have serious problems in the joint application. Most banks default to the <\/span><i><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">worst <\/span><\/i><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">credit rating of the joint applicants. <\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">You could find that, despite your glowing credit score, you can only get 60 per cent financing for your house; all because your spouse had a $1,000 debt written off when he was a university student. <\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">You should have a frank discussion about this before you buy \u2013 preferably with a qualified wealth manager. For example, if your spouse needs to wait five years for a previous bankruptcy to disappear, you might want to get a smaller home just under your name.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">In the meantime, you can build up bigger savings to upgrade as soon as your spouse can get a loan again.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">For less extreme situations, you may need to discuss putting your spouse on an aggressive debt repayment scheme. Doing this 12 months before a home application will improve their credit score (and help ensure they don\u2019t exceed the debt ratio). <\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Have a frank discussion with your spouse about their debt situation, as early as possible.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><em>What else do married couples need to look out for when buying their first-home?<\/em>\u00a0<em>Voice your thoughts in the comments section or on\u00a0<a href=\"https:\/\/www.facebook.com\/groups\/yourpropertycommunity\/\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener\">our Facebook community page<\/a><\/em>.<\/p>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n<p>If you liked this article, 99.co recommends\u00a0<a href=\"https:\/\/www.99.co\/singapore\/insider\/9-milestones-buy-first-condominium\/\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener\">9 milestones to hit before you buy your first condo [July 2018 update]<\/a>\u00a0and\u00a0<a href=\"https:\/\/www.99.co\/singapore\/insider\/buying-home-together-marriage\/\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener\">Thinking of buying a home together before marriage?<\/a><\/p>\n<p>Looking for a property? Find your dream home on Singapore\u2019s largest\u00a0<a href=\"http:\/\/www.99.co\/?utm_source=blog%20main%20site%20conversion\">property portal 99.co<\/a>!<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>So you\u2019ve just gotten into a big lifetime commitment of getting married, and want to celebrate that by getting into\u2026a big lifetime commitment of buying a home. Being Singaporean, most of us have a strict need to secure a house the moment we\u2019re married. That tends to result in some rash decisions, with consequences of&hellip;<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":21,"featured_media":55273,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_acf_changed":false,"_relevanssi_hide_post":"","_relevanssi_hide_content":"","_relevanssi_pin_for_all":"","_relevanssi_pin_keywords":"","_relevanssi_unpin_keywords":"","_relevanssi_related_keywords":"","_relevanssi_related_include_ids":"","_relevanssi_related_exclude_ids":"","_relevanssi_related_no_append":"","_relevanssi_related_not_related":"","_relevanssi_related_posts":"","_relevanssi_noindex_reason":"","_lmt_disableupdate":"","_lmt_disable":"","_genesis_hide_title":false,"_genesis_hide_breadcrumbs":false,"_genesis_hide_singular_image":false,"_genesis_hide_footer_widgets":false,"_genesis_custom_body_class":"","_genesis_custom_post_class":"","_genesis_layout":"","footnotes":""},"categories":[53593,53589,57131],"tags":[53595,54882,53634,54618],"persona":[],"class_list":{"2":"type-post","14":"entry","15":"has-post-thumbnail"},"acf":[],"yoast_head":"<!-- This site is optimized with the Yoast SEO Premium plugin v25.7.1 (Yoast SEO v25.7) - https:\/\/yoast.com\/wordpress\/plugins\/seo\/ -->\n<title>Buying your first home: 5 mistakes that put your marriage at risk - 99.co<\/title>\n<meta name=\"description\" content=\"Buying a home so soon after marriage tends to cause couples to make rash decisions that might flare up down the road. 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